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4/1/04 10:19 PM
Copyright 2004 David C. Loebig

Watch Out, I’m Looking for Trouble

I want to rant. Then I want to rant again. I want to rant and then beat somebody up. These spammers who send millions of e-mails with fake subjects and fake return addresses have got to be among the most selfish of all humanity. When given the power to use deception to intrude on millions, they do so for their own self-serving purposes.

Lincoln said, “Nearly all men can stand adversity, but if you want to test a man's character, give him power.”

These parasites have power and prove their character. I imagine these pathetic little people, unable to gain acceptance or success in legitimate relationships, sitting in their dark, little rooms devising ways to beat spam filtering software.

They purposely replace characters in the subject lines so the programs that delete messages with the word “Viagra” won’t find the word “vi@gra” because it is one character different. Then they apply their effort to come up with another 100 variations as well as blatantly deceptive subjects.

I get 10 real e-mails a day and 150 worthless, junk messages. A mere fraction of a fraction of the recipients wants these e-mails. To the other 99.99%, they are a persistent, annoying imposition. The $^$*#ng a&%$*&e spammers don’t care. They send them anyway, then they send them again, and then they send them again.

E-mail is easy and cheap, so it’s a great communication tool. It’s so easy and cheap the conniving spam weasels can send out millions of e-mails, get a small fraction of responses and still make money. To thwart them, we now have to make e-mail less efficient and more costly.

So the lesson is this: we need to be careful with efficiency. There are always people who will exploit it to impose themselves on others, so we may need to create inefficiencies as a barrier. Spammers, in effect, are a worthless drain on the world.

Until the e-mail system is “fixed” with inefficiency, selfish spam leeches will have an impact far out of proportion to their numbers, their value and their worthiness. They use technology to the ongoing, chronic detriment of everybody, and they just don’t care. They serve themselves, and that’s all that matters to them.

They may shout about free speech, but that’s just another power that tests their character. They have first amendment rights, and they misuse them, thus showing everybody their true colors.

Well, they don’t even do that, because they don’t have the fortitude to show themselves. They hide behind fake e-mail addresses to avoid accountability. They know their tactics are unethical. They are that 1% that manipulates and exploits others. They are the people the world would be better off without.

We all hate spam, so a column about my judgmental disdain for spammers may not be very enlightening. It may even be caustic. I just wanted to rant. Now I want to beat somebody up. Forgive me for my shortcomings.

Dave Loebig writes and banters out of the Tampa, Fla. area. You can banter with him at


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